Saturday, May 31, 2014

A Full-Day Tour of Johannesburg (and Soweto)

It almost felt like it would never happen, but I finally left Zambia and made my way to South Africa for the first time. It's a little bittersweet to leave a place I considered like a home for three months (even if it was a hotel), but I'm happy to move on to South Africa. Strangely, prior to this trip, I had only transited through South Africa but never found my way past the airport. Happily, that has finally changed. While here, I'm staying in Pretoria, one of three of South Africa's capital, but the city itself is 40 minutes north of the main international airport (O.R. Tambo International Airport), and about 45 minutes from northwestern South Africa's most famous city, Johannesburg.

Johannesburg Morning
Thankfully, coming from Zambia, I was not jetlagged when I arrived in South Africa. So after settling into Pretoria yesterday, I decided that today I needed to get out and explore a bit. However, Pretoria is a small city, relatively speaking, so I figured I'd make my way to Johannesburg instead. Happily for me, there's a really nice train--the Gautrain--that runs between the two cities, somewhere between a commuter train and a metro. There are only a handful of stops between Pretoria and Johannesburg, and for just about $5.50, I had a lovely trip seeing the suburbs of Gauteng Province. And, to top it all off, it let me off right in the middle of Johannesburg.


Street in Johannesburg
So I always see the double-decker red buses in DC, the "Hop-On-Hop-Off" and wondered who took them to see a city. Well, now I know. I figured it was not only the easiest way to get a highlights tour of Johannesburg, but also probably the safest way to make sure I stayed out of any really bad neighborhoods. It was such a great tour, that now I'm thinking I might need to try the DC one some time just to see what I don't know about my own near-ish city. Plus, most of the people that were on the bus with me throughout the day are actually South Africans--mostly from Johannesburg, in fact--but thought it would be a great way to see their own city as well and show it to their friends who had come into town. Anyway, long story short, I would definitely recommend it to anyone who visits Johannesburg. Of the 11 stops the bus made, I only got off and did activities at three.


View of Sandton from Carlton Centre
View from Carlton Centre
The first was Carlton Centre, a 50-story skyscraper in the center of the city. Not only has it been South Africa's tallest building for decades, but for a long time it was also the tallest building in the Southern Hemisphere. As expected, the views from the top were spectacular. To the west was a great view of Soccer City, to the north it was possible to see the outline of the buildings in the suburb of Sandton, to the east Ellis Park and some of the gold mines, and to the south even more mines. Again, the best word to describe it all was spectacular. However, it did prove something the guides mentioned: Johannesburg is one of the worst locations to put a city, and even worse to put a massive metropolis. The world's largest city not on a river, lake, or coastline, there's no natural freshwater anywhere near Johannesburg (they ship it in from hundreds of kilometers away in Lesotho) and the high altitude makes it even more difficult. All of that was on perfect display.

Soweto
Soccer City
My second stop on the tour was Soweto, although that was really a side tour. Soweto (formerly known as the SOuth WEst TOwnship) is sort of a massive multi-million person suburb of Johannesburg (although technically it has been absorbed by the City of Johannesburg Municipality...blame South Africa's crazy local government laws for this one) and it has a bad reputation. Although there are now rich and middle class folks living in Soweto, there are still many very poor people and slums in the area, which gives it the bad reputation. It was fascinating driving around Soweto and seeing the highlights in a quick 2.5 hours, including Nelson Mandela's house, Desmond Tutu's house, and the world's third-largest hospital, Chris Hani Baragwanath Academic Hospital. Oh, and Soccer City up-close, and the home of the Orlando Pirates soccer team.


Couple Reunited at Apartheid Museum
My final stop on the tour was the Apartheid Museum, the one thing everyone told me was a must. It was on OK museum, I suppose, but it was a heavy reading sort of museum. I've now been to a few museums with heavy subject matter (Yad Vashem in Jerusalem and the Genocide Museum in Kigali come to my mind), and the parts that had the most impact were the ones that were symbolic in nature. The Apartheid Museum started off strong--people randomly separated into "White" and "Non-White" entrances who then meet up after the first exhibit. It was interesting to watch a few couples who were split up reunite after the first part. To me, that was one of the most powerful parts of the museum.


Street Corner in Braamfontein
Street Dancing in Braamfontein
And then after that I returned to central Johannesburg on the bus, just seeing some of the other cool neighborhoods. For example, Braamfontein, the area near the University of Witwatersrand, was as hippie and artsy as the areas around other cities' universities. I suppose some things are universal. I took the Gautrain back to Pretoria (well, Hatfield, really, because it's closer to my hotel) and decided to call it a night and stay in. It was a great day seeing Johannesburg and Soweto, and even though I've only been in South Africa for just over 24 hours and people tell me that at times the "development" and "Westerness" of South Africa are just veneers, I can totally see how people can get into this. It's just enough Africa and just enough Europe to keep you entertained. Maybe not for long-term, but for a week, I think I'll like it.

I know I've already posted a Trevor Noah video before, but this one is also amazing and unfortunately way too true:

Saturday, May 24, 2014

I'm Starting To Think I Need A Life :)

Two things that happened today made me realize that. The first is embarrassing, but what's the point of having a blog if slightly embarrassing things don't occasionally make it onto it? So today, I was at Spur Copper Creek, a steak restaurant at Manda Hill Mall (btw, if you guessed that it's Native American-themed, you'd be right...although I never suggested you take a guess. Oh well). Anyway, this restaurant's music choices are occasionally odd. A few months ago I made the unfortunate mistake of walking in at the start of them playing a Best of Celine Dion CD. Today, while I was waiting for my food, Bennie and the Jets came on. And all I could think of was this:
Yes, the first thing that came to mind for me was a scene from the 27 Dresses. Thankfully I resisted any urge to jump up onto the table and belt out the wrong lyrics!
 
The second thing has already been posted to Facebook, but alas, here it goes as well. I was reading some newspaper, and they mentioned how Malawi's post-independence political history parallels Zambia's, and in ways that are eerier than most countries. I got super giddy reading this and then spent time on Wikipedia, and lo and behold, the newspaper I saw it in was right. (I sadly don't remember what newspaper I read it in, and can't find it online.) Yet here's the premise of how they're very eerily paralleled:
  1. The first president ruled from the mid-60s to the early 90s.
  2. The first president lost the first multiparty election and stepped aside.
  3. The second president ruled for 10 years.
  4. The third president was of the same party as the second president.
  5. The third president died partway into his second term.
  6. The Vice President, Banda, becomes President.
  7. Vice President Banda runs in the next election and doesn't win.
Yes, reading about the parallel was really cool for me. I like when things like that happen. In any case, my thinking of a scene in the movie 27 Dresses and realizing the things that make me giddy, I've decided I probably need to get a life and get out more. With just 2 weeks until I'm back in the US, it could happen very soon!!! Oh, and enjoy the below video. This one and the most recent one (#7) are my favorites:

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Apparently Zambia Has Run Out of Cloth Napkins

That's the only logical conclusion I can come to anyhow. Now I realize that this is very much a first-world problem and not that bad in the scheme of things, but it's so bizarre, I just needed to share it. Yesterday I decided to eat dinner at my hotel. When they brought me my food I asked if they had a serviette (apparently that's the word for napkin everywhere in the world except for the US). The woman said she had given me one already and pointed to the baby napkin sitting under my drink. "No, a cloth one," I asked in my nicest voice. Her response was baffling: "Sorry, we've run out." She then proceeded to bring me a stack of about 15 cocktail napkins. My question is how does a hotel run out of cloth napkins, especially a hotel with TWO restaurants--one of which is relatively high-class--and especially since this was at the beginning of the dinner hour.

Then today, I went to my favorite steak restaurant, which has cloth tablecloths and usually cloth napkins, but I actually saw them bringing back a bag with some packs of napkins. Once again, I don't understand--where did all the cloth napkins go? I'm curious as to whether or not this is a trend or just a very odd coincidence. I look forward to seeing how this goes.

So the other day I discovered Trevor Noah, and apparently he's coming to DC some point this year, and I hope to see him live. He's a South African comedian and has great material. This video about Bafana Bafana, South Africa's national soccer team, really cracks me up. Oh, and the clip mentions Zambia, so I had to pay special attention to it! :)

Thursday, May 8, 2014

I Guess I Didn't Take a Russian Children's Poem's Advice on Traveling in Africa

A common rendering of Barmaley
I studied Russian for three years in high school, yet except for a small amount of vocabulary and some grammar rules, my knowledge of the language has mostly dissipated. I guess that's what happens when you take several other languages in the intervening years...the brain only has room for so many. Well, there's one major exception to my dwindling Russian knowledge, and that's a common children's poem called Barmaley. I vividly remember senior year (so, that'd be about 8 years ago now) memorizing the first stanza of the poem, and not only can I recite it back to this day--weird, I know--I still remember what all the words in it mean. This, effectively, is 90% of my limited Russian vocabulary.
 
The poem Barmaley starts off as a warning to kids not to go traveling around Africa. Oops. It was only today that it finally hit me. I wasn't really into Africa during high school; I was much more fascinated by Southeast Asia at the time (that fascination hasn't gone away, it's just been surpassed by sub-Saharan Africa). So today, as my eyes glazed over temporarily at work, out of the blue the words to Barmaley popped into my head. The poem goes like this:
 
Маленькие дети! Ни за что на свете
Не ходите в Африку, в Африку гулять!
В Африке акулы, в Африке гориллы,
В Африке большие, злые крокодилы
Будут вас кусать, бить и обижать,
Не ходите, дети, в Африку гулять.
 
For those who don't read/understand Russian, the poem, as transliterated by me (with a little assistance from Google Translate, but I've re-Englishized it to make it sound normal and poetic still):
 
Little children! Under no circumstances in the world
Don't go to Africa, in Africa for a walk
In Africa there are sharks, in Africa there are gorillas
In Africa there are big, evil crocodiles
They will bite you, beat and hurt you
Don't go, children, in Africa for a walk
 
Yeah, I guess I didn't take that advice. Not only have I traipsed around the continent, but I've also gotten up close and personal with gorillas in Rwanda. I haven't done a walking safari yet--some day, perhaps--but I would still say that I've completely violated the author of Barmaley's advice.
 
Anyway, that was the whole point of this post. I find it strange that I remember this poem so well, and how it is somewhat relevant to my life nowadays. At least for now I've avoided the main reason the author tells children to avoid Africa, because Barmaley is an evil pirate who eats children.
 
В Африке разбойник, в Африке злодей,
(In Africa there's a robber, in Africa there's a villain)
В Африке ужасный Бар-ма-лей!
(In Africa there's the terrible Bar-ma-ley!)
Он бегает по Африке и кушает детей
(He runs about Africa and eats children)
Гадкий, нехороший, жадный Бармалей!
(Nasty, vicious, greedy Barmaley!)
 
And to conclude, I love this video and finally am remembering to connect it to a post on this blog as a video of something that makes me happy: