Reflections on Six Months in Khartoum

Today is my six-month anniversary in Khartoum. It has been an absolute whirlwind and I am now very happy that I made the decision to come out here. Between the people, sense of community, and just general life environment, I feel like I've been able to become a better version of myself. At the core I'm still the same person I was in Virginia, but life in Khartoum has helped me develop some parts of myself--such as the social part--that were severely lacking back in the States.

I'm still an introvert, but when I arrived in Sudan, I decided that if there was ever a time for me to come out of my shell, this would be it. Plus, it doesn't hurt that there's an unofficial rule I've heard that you say "yes" for your first month at any new post. So that's what I did. I said "yes" to every party, "yes" to every dinner, and "yes" to every casual get-together. And that made me meet people, find my group, and quickly feel a part of the community here, both Americans and non-Americans. I think I really noticed it during my R&R in October. By the end of my three weeks away I was starting to miss Khartoum. Maybe not Khartoum itself, but the people in Khartoum. Spending time with my friends in Khartoum. And the rhythm of life in Khartoum. Khartoum is home, and that realization has made my time here all that much better.

In addition to all the events I go to now, I've obviously also adopted a street puppy who has way more energy than me. For instance, while I was writing this post, he ran around and around and around my couch and tables. Endlessly. It tires me to watch him do that. But the best part about having a puppy is that he gives me something to come home to after work every day. Obviously he's a lot of work, but it's work I'm willing to put in, as long as he will eventually get to a point where he won't need me to wake up at 3am every morning to take him out to pee. I've had him for just about a month now--and he's about 3 months old--and I'm really enjoying that he's starting to be trained, as in he now listens when I tell him to go into his crate at night. Now I just need to work on all the other parts of training a dog!

One of the negative parts of living overseas is missing things. For instance, I've missed two weddings I really wanted to go to. I don't get to see my family as often, although Skype, FaceTime, and other forms of technology really help here. But I can't pick up my nephew or try to feed him an Oreo. Instead, I can show him the clocks in my house to hear him go "tick tock" or show him my puppy and hear him call out to "Rggy's Doggy."

I knew there would be these tradeoffs, but I still think the positives outweigh the negatives, so back to the positives, because I'm a positive person now (ha!!!). In addition to just being a happy, relatively social person out here (wasn't sure I was capable of being a social butterfly, to be honest), here's a quick rundown of a few other (not-so-important) things I've noticed in the past six months:

1. I'm not that bad at Candy Crush Soda Saga. I started playing it three days before I left for Sudan. I'm now on Level 577.

2. Amazon is absolutely amazing. And Amazon Pantry is the best part of Amazon. Yes, mail is slow, but I'm willing to wait the 3ish weeks for things because whenever I need something, I know I can "find it on Amazon."

3. Speaking of mail...mail day at the Embassy is always the best day of the week. And I do enjoy sending mail out too--up to 32 letters out over the last 6 months, with a few more I plan on writing this long weekend.

4. You can take the boy out of Jersey, but you can't take the Jersey out of the boy. Even though I've been out of New Jersey for 10 years. put a good dance song on and the fist pump comes out. It's a legitimate dance move.

5. Journey's Don't Stop Believing is really an American thing. Many American parties end with it, and the non-Americans don't seem to get as excited for it as the Americans do.

So 6 months down, at least 18 months to go. I'm excited to see what the coming weeks and months bring. Hopefully more trips to other parts of Sudan (I've only made it up to Meroe, site of Sudan's pyramids, so far), more trips outside of Sudan, and more fun times with the group of friends and family I've made in Khartoum!

This post's happy video is a song I've been hearing a lot on the radio recently, and it just seems to fit. It's about living in the moment, making the most of where you're at. Plus, it's John Legend. So enjoy!

I Am Not Ashamed. I Will Not Apologize. I Believe in the United States.

I am not ashamed to be an American. I will not apologize to anyone for the election of Donald Trump. I believe in the United States and believe that the country will continue to move forward and prosper in the years to come.

American Flag, St. Thomas, US Virgin Islands

When I joined the Federal Government in 2010, I swore an oath to the Constitution of the United States of America, and I still believe in that oath today. I swore to uphold the rights of all Americans, to serve the interests and needs of all Americans, and to be an ambassador for the American people abroad. That's why I'm disgusted by people who are threatening to move to Canada over Trump's election (and yes, I was just as mad in 2008 when people threatened to leave over Obama's election). Leaving the United States because of an election is a cowardly move that indicates the person doesn't believe in all the things that makes the United States great. That the person has no faith in their family, friends, acquaintances, or the almost 320 million fellow Americans to be good, upstanding people. There are about 2.8 million federal employees, and I can guarantee you that almost all of us will continue to faithfully serve our country--not just the individual leading the country--because we believe in what we do and the people we serve. The election of Donald Trump does not change who Americans are; we are still the fundamentally the same people we were yesterday.

I'm neither happy nor sad about the electino results. Truly. As happened back in June, though, with the negative things said about those in the "Leave" campaign for Brexit, I'm thoroughly disappointed in the casting of all 59 million Donald Trump voters as racist, xenophobic, homophobic, white supremacists. Because that's not who they are. Many Trump supporters are people who felt like they were being left behind. If you felt that way, wouldn't you also seek to change your condition by voting for the candidate that you thought heard you and your concerns? I didn't see it often, but every now and then this sentiment popped up on my Facebook feed, and it helped me understand the anger emanating from so many parts of the country. People didn't vote for Trump because they agreed with his extremely inappropriate comments, they voted for Trump because he made people feel heard, wanted, and included in a United States they thought they no longer recognized.

The problem, as I'm sure the after-action reports will eventually say, is that Trump's election went against "conventional wisdom." Well, so did Brexit. And the Colombian Peace Referendum. Perhaps "conventional wisdom" only works among political wonks and pundits who have lost touch with who the people actually casting ballots are. Rather than dismissing these people's concerns, it would help if we all tried to listen to one another more to understand other perspectives.

And that is why I am not ashamed to be an American tonight and will not apologize for Donald Trump's election. Because I don't have to conform to "conventional wisdom." And because it is not my right to be ashamed of the feelings of more than 59 million Donald Trump supporters, many of whom have legitimate issues with their conditions and the prospects for improvement. These Americans' voices deserve to be heard just as much as any other person's. But most importantly, I continue to believe in this country that has given me so much and for which I see my service as repaying. As Hillary Clinton said in her concession speech, we need to give Donald Trump a chance. And his supporters a chance, too. I know I will, because my oath to the American constitution applies to all those living under it, including Trump's 59 million voters and Clinton's 59 million voters.

The United States is a great country, and while things may seem rocky to so many people right now, we are a country that always pulls through. I look forward to serving the American people and the American constitution under a President Trump and however many other presidents will follow him in the years to come.

I Will Never...

It's a phrase I use a lot, and I think it's because it gives me some certainty in this increasingly uncertain world. Saying I will never do something comes with a full stop. Period. No negotiations. The problem with it, though, is that I oftentimes find myself doing what I said I would never do. I'm proud of myself for that, because it means I'm open to new ideas and am willing to change. Two weeks ago I broke my latest "I will never" when I found myself unable to say no to this little face.

Xeno, 3 November 2016

Meet Xeno, my new puppy. Xeno was probably born in late August and is a Sudanese street puppy, although I'm happy that he doesn't have the typical "desert dog" look common among street dogs. He and another dog we are assuming/calling his brother were wandering around a trash heap here in Khartoum and were found by two international teachers. They rescued him and knew that I had a soft spot for "the right dog" (my way of saying "I will never get a dog") and reached out to me. Well, they found the right dog. And now he is mine.

Xeno, 24 October 2016

As the pictures show, he's mostly black with tan legs, a tan face, and white paws and tail tip. He has a long tail that he's very good at catching and eating. His paws are pretty big and he has long legs that just keep getting longer. The vet is pretty sure he's going to be a big dog, so I'm in for a wild ride!

Xeno's been in my house for about two weeks now and is slowly getting adjusted to my rhythm, getting regular meals, having other dogs to play with (not just fight with for things), and the like. His personality is starting to show. He's a relatively mellow dog for being only a few weeks old, but loves to chew on power cords and step on anything that resembles a button. On the plus side with that, he's not a fan of eating shoes? Xeno is terrible at stairs (he's fallen down stairs three times already, each time hurting one of his paws and limping around my house for a few hours), clearly understands the word "no" but then does it anyway when he thinks I'm not looking, and thoroughly enjoys playing with his two chew ties, which are a rope giraffe and a felt zebra.

Xeno, 23 October 2016

So where does the name Xeno come from? Well, there are two parts. The first is from Harry Potter. Xenophilius Lovegood is a believer of wild conspiracy theories and seemingly nonexistent creatures. However, while many consider him crazy, he is a true believer and is willing to help anyone in their quest to find the answers and proof of the things he knows exist but maybe can't prove. In Harry's case, those are the Deathly Hallows. So Xeno is named after Xenophilius Lovegood because I admire his dedication to the causes and things he believes in, even when others tell him he's crazy.

The other part of his name is that "xeno-" is a prefix meaning "foreign." While most associate the prefix with the negative (xenophobia), I'm thinking of it as part of a positive (xenophilia). Thus, Xeno is also short for xenophilia, a love of foreign things. Seemed fitting given that he's a dog I adopted while living and serving overseas.

So there it is, I adopted a Sudanese street dog and named him Xeno. He's been a lot of work, but I'm excited to have a very energetic and happy dog to come home to every night after work. He seems to be adjusting well to life in a house, and I'm looking forward to many years with him!

Every now and then I find a YouTube channel to obsess over (you can wipe that shocked look off your face!), and one of my favorites is Kevin, Karla, y La Banda, a brother-sister duo from Chile. They take songs originally in English and translate/interpret them into Spanish, and they're amazing. Here's one of my favorites to end this happy post with a happy video: